The Cold Can't Keep Us Apart
by Serie11
Summary: Over the Christmas break of senior year, Dean and Cas work things out.


Dean taps his foot impatiently, checking his watch. Sam is running late – like usual – and he wants to be home as soon as he can because he's meeting up with Cas later tonight, and he doesn't want to be late. Sam is on the debating team, and Dean had seen half a dozen other kids come out fifteen minutes ago, which are the rest of the team. However, Sam is still inside, and Dean hadn't seen Jess come out either. Which meant that they were still in there. Together.

Dean can't help smirking as Sam _finally_ appears. He's blushing slightly, and Jess is walking out beside him. They're not holding hands, but Dean is sure that it won't be long before they are – if Sam doesn't ask Jess out soon, he's sure that Jess is going to ask his brother out. They pause just out of hearing range and exchange a few more words. Sam blushes even more and Jess smiles happily at him, and Dean can't help but grin stupidly at his brother's happiness.

Jess finally parts from Sam and walks over to one of the other cars in the car park, a shiny blue Corolla. Sam comes over to Dean slowly, still looking after Jess.

"Did you have a good time at your nerd club?" Dean asks him when he gets close. Sam nods, flashing a smile up at him.

"Yeah, it was really good. Mrs Samson gave us our new topic that we're going to be writing our speeches for over the next few weeks. Dean, Jess is on my team this time!" Sam looks like he doesn't know which to be more excited about – the new topic or Jess being on his team.

Dean ruffles his brother's hair. Sam is growing quickly, and Dean won't be surprised if he ends up being taller than he is. Sam scowls at him and jumps away, but can't keep the expression up for long. Dean laughs at Sam's expression and gets into the Impala.

Sam shuts the passenger door and Dean backs out of his parking spot, making sure that no one else is in the car park. Jess's Corolla is already gone, and there are only other stationary cars left, most likely those teachers who are still inside the school.

The drive back to their apartment doesn't take long, and Sam is bouncing up the stairs to their place on the fourth floor faster than Dean. When he gets to their door, Sam is opening it slowly, not knowing if dad is inside or not.

Dean follows Sam inside, and their father doesn't appear to be inside, which either means that he's working today or that he's passed out somewhere that isn't inside. Dean feels a surge of worry, but he sighs and dismisses it. Dad would come home or he wouldn't, and there's nothing that Dean can do about it.

Sam is already looking through the cupboard, seeing if they have any food lying around. Dean already knows that there isn't, and Sam closes the door with a soft sigh. Dean grits his teeth and goes to change out of the clothes he had been wearing into something warmer. He's meeting Cas at their café, but he still wants to be warm.

He comes out of his room to find Sam at the table, books open in front of him. Dean grins at him as he walks past.

"I'm going out to meet up with Cas. You 'll be alright here, won't you?"

Sam nods. "Yes, Dean. I'll be fine. Go meet up with Cas." Dean frowns a little at Sam when his brother rolls his eyes slightly, but he shrugs it off. Grabbing the keys to the Impala, he makes sure that the door is closed after him before he continues on.

He's meeting Cas at the Angel Café. It's one of Cas's favourite places to eat, and since Dean knows some of the people who work there, it's somewhere where he feels at ease. It's become their meeting place over the years, ever since they first met each other in sophomore year, where they were assigned as lab partners in biology. They've been friends ever since, through Dean's troubles with his father and Cas's troubles with his entire family. The only one who really supports him is his twin, Anna, and Dean is thankful for her for helping out Cas when he can't be there.

And if he spends more time with Cas then he does anyone else except Sam, well. He's his best friend. And that's all it is.

Dean walks into the Angel Café to find that Cas is already at their table in the far corner. Hannah nods at him from where she's working at cash register, and Nathaniel is making the rounds between the tables.

Dean sits down opposite Cas, trying not to grin. This is the first time that he's gotten to spend time with him for nearly a week, and Dean's been looking forward to it immensely. Cas looks up from his book and his eyes light up and crinkle slightly around the edges, which Dean knows is Cas for a big grin.

"Hello Dean," Cas greets him, and he puts his book back in his bag.

"Hey Cas," Dean replies, putting his bag under his chair and leaning forward on his elbows to get as close to Cas as he can. From across the table he can smell him, soft lavender and cinnamon.

"Sam's not here?" Cas asks, looking around. Dean shakes his head.

"No. He wanted to do some homework, or something."

Cas nods. "He's very dedicated."

"Nearly as dedicated as you are," Dean replies, grinning. Cas is one of the top students in their grade, and Dean wouldn't be surprised if he ends up coming first in their year.

Cas lifts a shoulder and then drops it. "Sam will go far."

"Yeah," Dean says proudly. "Yeah, he will. Hey, are you going to Charlie's Christmas party?"

Cas purses his mouth slightly. "It's on Christmas day, isn't it?" Dean nods. Cas sighs quietly. "I think my extended family is coming around to all… celebrate." Cas looks like there's ashes in his mouth as he says the word, and Dean winces with him.

"All the better reason to get out now," Dean replies. "Say you already said you were going, or something. Just don't spend time with those assholes."

"Those assholes are my family, Dean," Cas rebukes him, but he doesn't put much force behind the words, and Dean knows that he isn't exactly fond of them. "If I do, my father will tell me that I have to come, anyway. I should tell Charlie that I'm not going."

Dean frowns, but he can't exactly force Cas to come, and Cas's dad wold probably do something crazy if he didn't show up to his Christmas party. "That sucks," Dean finally says, and he reaches his foot forward to touch Cas's feet slightly.

Cas smiles at him, the corners of his mouth twitching up. "I should bring a date. That would make them make me leave fairly quickly."

Yeah, Cas's family of devout Christians probably wouldn't be fine with him bringing a guy as a date. "Because you date so much," Dean says, trying to poke fun but fearing that it falls flat slightly. He ignores the spike of jealously that had flared in his gut and shoots a lopsided smile at Cas instead.

"Just because I've never dated before doesn't mean I can't start," Cas says quietly. Dean swallows and nods.

Naomi has to kick them out when the Café closes at nine. Cas lives a short walk from here, but Dean's a bit further out, which is why he has to drive.

"You want me to give you a ride?" Dean asks him, and Cas shakes his head.

"I can walk. You should get back to Sam and make sure that your father is home."

Dean nods, and steps forward to hug Cas. Cas wraps his arms around his waist and Dean sighs quietly into his neck. "Okay," Dean says softly, the reason Cas can hear him is because Dean's mouth is near his ear. "I'll go home. But remember, if you need somewhere to crash…"

"I'll call," Cas reassures him, and Dean reluctantly lets him go when Cas takes a step back. "Have a safe trip," he says, and Dean nods. Cas turns and begins walking as Dean crosses the road to the Impala. He doesn't get in just yet though, watching as Cas turns the corner and continues walking towards his house before he gets in.

When Dean unlocks his door, he can already tell that John is home. He's sprawled out on the couch, and Dean grimaces slightly as he deposits the keys in their customary place near the door, but then pockets them again after a glance at his dad.

Sam is nowhere in sight, so Dean can only assume that he's already gone to bed, even though it's only ten. He might just be in his room, not wanting to disturb John, so Dean knocks softly on Sam's door before pushing it open.

Sam's light is on, but he's asleep, book open against his chest where he's probably fallen asleep reading it. Dean can't keep a soft smile off his face, and he carefully takes the book from his brother's lax grasp and puts in on his bedside table. He closes Sam's door after him after turning off the light, and walks slowly to the bathroom to brush his teeth.

He takes his excess clothes off him in room, not bothering to turn his light on. And if he falls asleep thinking about Cas's soft smile, well that's no one's business but his own.

"You're wearing that?" Sam asks him dubiously.

"What's wrong with it?" Dean asks defensively.

"It's very… green," Sam says, waving his hand up and down vaguely.

Dean scowls at him and stomps down the hall to the mirror in the bathroom. Looking at his shirt, he does conclude that the shirt is _maybe_ a little over the top… _maybe._

They had spent the morning doing the things that families do on Christmas – exchanged presents, eaten too many candy canes, had the continuous stream of Christmas movies playing in the background on their shitty TV. John hadn't been in, but Dean can't bring himself to worry about his father today of all days. Sam had called Jess – she'd finally asked him out on the last day of school, and in Dean's opinion, they are sickening cute together – and Dean had fought the urge to call Cas, instead preparing for the party that evening.

How Charlie managed to get her parents to agree on a Christmas party on Christmas, Dean had no idea, but it probably has something to do with Charlie's puppy eyes – they aren't as good as Sam's, but it's a close thing. Dean's just going to spend an hour or two at the party, catching up with his friends over break. He doesn't want to be away from Sam for too long when dad isn't around.

"Charlie wants everyone to be in Christmas colours," Dean yells down the hall.

"So you can't wear something red?" Sam shouts back. Dean grumbles under his breath as he goes back to his room to see if he owns any red shirts. There's one, but when Dean holds it up, he quickly comes to the conclusion that it's far too small to wear.

"I don't have anything red," Dean says, sticking his head out of his door to find Sam standing outside.

"Well, then just don't wear that," Sam says disapprovingly. Dean sighs and pulls it off, picking up another, much more normal looking black shirt and pulling it over his head.

"I'll head round to Cas's and see if he has anything," Dean says. It would give him the perfect excuse to head around to Cas's and check on him before all of the Class A fuckers he has to call relatives arrive.

Sam smirks for half a second, and Dean tilts his head slightly in confusion, but then the expression is wiped form his brother's face, and Sam is pulling him down the hall.

"Go on then," he chirps. "Go see Cas, and then go to the party. I'll see you when you come back, okay?"

"Alright," Dean agrees, slightly surprised by his brother's eagerness to get him out the door. "Call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sam says. "Just go."

Dean is left standing outside the apartment with his keys and nothing else. Shrugging, he heads downstairs to the Impala. There's snow on the ground from where it had fallen last night, and Dean is careful as he traverses the icy streets.

There aren't too many cars outside Cas's massive house, so Dean thinks that there shouldn't be heaps of people inside from Cas's extended family. He trudges up on the path that's free of snow, even though there are a few inches on the lawn. The Novak's must still have a gardener on call to clear the snow.

Dean knocks on the door, shivering slightly, even though he's wearing his leather jacket. There's the sound of footsteps, and the door opens to reveal Anna, her red hair bound up in a bun and wearing something that probably cost more than Dean's monthly rent.

"Dean," she says, looking surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"I need to talk to Cas," Dean replies. "He's here?"

Anna nods, and takes a step back so that Dean can come in. Dean stops his feet off to rid them of the dirt and slush on them, but still takes his boots off in the entrance way to be polite.

Dean heads upstairs to Cas' bedroom, not needing Anna to tell him that his friend is there. He knocks on the door, and Cas's voice calls out from beyond the door.

"I don't care who just arrived, Anna, I'm not coming down yet."

"Not even to say hello to me?" Dean asks him through the door, voice light and teasing. The door swings open a second later, and Cas is standing there, looking surprised.

Dean only looks down at what he's wearing for half a second – _suit, tie, pants that were too tight for Dean not to notice_ – before yanking his eyes back up to Cas's face.

"Dean?" Cas asks him. "What are you doing here?"

"Just checking up on you," Dean says casually, leaning up against his doorframe. "And I need a red shirt."

Cas raises an eyebrow and steps back into his room. Dean follows, closing the door behind him. As always, he takes a second to be amazed by Cas's room, with its massive bed, the pure organisation of the gigantic bookshelf that takes up one entire wall. There are sketches of feathers and wings covering the desk near the large window, and like usual, Dean doesn't ask about them. The one time he had, Cas had gotten uncomfortable and uneasy, which had shut Dean up fast.

Cas goes over to the wall length mirrors that take up another wall, and he slides one of them open to reveal his wardrobe. Cas digs through one of the drawers, looking for a red top, and by the time Dean makes his way over towards him, Cas has found one.

"Is this suitable?" Cas asks him. Dean looks at it. It's simple, plain red with no design, a normal shirt.

"Yeah, it's good." He takes off his jacket and strips off his shirt.

"I assume this is for Charlie's party?" Cas asks him. He's not looking at anything other than Dean's face, and it wasn't like Dean came over here to take off his shirt in front of Cas or anything anyway, so it doesn't really matter.

"Yeah, she wanted red or green, and apparently my green shirt is not appropriate."

"Really?" Cas asks, lips twitching upwards in a sign of amusement. "Why does Sam think it's not good enough?"

"Who knows?" Dean asks him, putting the red shirt on. "He's probably burned it by now though, by the way he was looking at it."

Cas laughs softly, and something in Dean eases at its sound. Ever since school got out, he's seen far less of Cas than he would like. His parents had been restricting his movements, and Dean knows that he isn't exactly welcome here.

"You can still come with me," Dean says quietly. "You don't want to be here."

Cas looks away from him. "I can't."

Dean feels a rush of frustration. "Why? What can they do?"

Cas shakes his head once, sharply. "I can't, Dean."

Dean grabs his shoulders and makes him face him. "Cas," he starts, and when Cas doesn't look at him, he puts a finger under his chin to tilt his head up. "Cas," he says again, softly. "You can't let them control you like this. You still haven't told them that you want to go into medicine instead of law, have you?"

Cas slowly shakes his head. "Goddamnit, Cas," Dean breathes softly. "Come here," he says gruffly, and Cas willingly folds into his arms. Dean tucks Cas's head under his chin and breathes into his hair. Cas's hands are gripping his shirt tightly, and Dean makes no move to push him away, letting Cas take whatever he needs from him.

"I'll… I'll tell them soon," Cas says, voice on the verge of cracking. Dean tightens his arms around him, wanting to protect him from the world. "I will."

"You're eighteen," Dean tells him. "You don't need them anymore, Cas."

Cas nods, and then relaxes, conforming to Dean's body snugly. Dean tries to take nothing from it, feeling like shit because Cas is freaking out, and he's enjoying holding him.

Cas eventually leans backwards, and Dean lets him go reluctantly. "You should leave," Cas tells him. "If you want to be on time."

Right now he couldn't care less about the party, but he nods anyway. "Yeah. Look, if your family annoys you too much, just text me."

"Okay," Cas agrees, and Dean nods. Cas opens his door and Dean shrugs on his jacket as they go down the stairs.

There are two people in the hallway near the front door that Dean doesn't recognise. Cas freezes in front of him but then sets his shoulders stubbornly, and Dean feels a bubble of apprehension in his stomach.

Cas doesn't get past them before the man is turning around. "Castiel," he says, sounding like someone's just stuck something unpleasant under his nose and he has no choice but to smell it.

"Zachariah," Cas says stiffly. "Good evening."

"Who's this?" Zachariah asks instead of responding to that, and Dean immediately christens him Douche Ass in his head.

"My friend, Dean," Cas says, voice still cold. "He was just leaving."

" _Just_ a friend?" Douche Ass asks, eyebrow raised. "Are you sure about that Castiel?"

The woman turns and looks Dean over disparagingly. Dean tries not to feel inadequate under the stare, but something in her eyes makes him feel like he doesn't measure up to whatever image she's comparing him to. She gets named Arm Candy.

"Yes, I am sure," Cas replies frostily.

"You could have at least chosen someone of good blood," Arm Candy sniffs. "I would wager that those jeans were bought in a discount store. If you insist on your homosexuality, you could at least have good taste."

Dean feels his face heating up, both from embarrassment – _so what_ if these jeans had been bought at a Salvation Army store, not everyone could have buckets of money lying around – and from anger – _how dare_ these people talk that way to Cas? They know _nothing_ about his friend. Cas must see the anger enter his eyes, because he takes a step closer to him and brushes their hands together, which probably does nothing to dissuade Douche Ass and Arm Candy from thinking that they're a couple.

"Dean, come on," Cas says, walking past the horrible people. Dean shoots a glare at them as he walks past them.

"Sorry," Cas mutters as Dean puts his shoes back on.

"It's fine, Cas," Dean reassures him. "Just don't put up with too much of their shit, alright?"

Cas nods slightly, and Dean smiles at him.

Walking down the path, Dean passes more people heading up to the house in fancy dresses and suits. He keeps his head down though, and doesn't look any of them in the eyes, not wanting to get Cas into any more trouble than he already is.

Charlie's place is on the outskirts of town, and it takes Dean twenty minutes to get there. When he arrives, there's loud music pouring out into the street, and people walking into the house. How Charlie managed to get her parents to agree to the party, Dean has no idea.

"Dean!" He's greeted as he walks in the door. He grabs Benny's forearm and grins at his friend. "You made it, I see," Benny drawls, and Dean nods.

"Yeah, I managed. You're looking pretty good," Dean comments, snorting at Benny's get up. Benny's is wearing s very cheap looking Santa suit, and Benny rolls his eyes.

"You're about the third one to say so tonight. Apparently I took the Christmas theme a bit _too_ far."

"Maybe just a bit," Dean has a chance to answer, before the tide of the people coming in pushes them apart. Dean follows the crowd to the kitchen, hoping to find Charlie. There's a couple making out against the wall and several people gathered around the sink smoking something that doesn't smell like tobacco to Dean, but he really doesn't want to know.

He avoids going upstairs, knowing that Charlie wouldn't be up there, and makes his way into the lounge room, nodding to the people that he knows that are around. There's a lot of people, and Dean's quite surprised that Charlie managed to get this many people to come around to her place for a Christmas party on Christmas day. He shrugs the question off and finally spots the founder of the party in one corner of the lounge room, laughing with Dorothy and Lisa.

"Hey Charlie," Dean says. The three girls make room in their circle for him, and they all smile at him.

"Hey Dean!" Charlie greets him enthusiastically. Dean's assaulted with one of her hugs, which he takes cheerfully. Dorothy and Lisa laugh at them, and Charlie eventually let him go. She looks around, and frowns slightly. "No Cas?" She asks, pouting with disappointment.

"Didn't he tell you that he couldn't make it?" Dean asks her, surprised.

"No, he didn't," Charlie says. "That's not like him."

"No," Dean says quietly. "It isn't."

The meeting with his relatives must have been putting Cas off more than he had been letting on. With school out, Dean hasn't been seeing him heaps, so it would have been easier for him to hide it, but Dean is still frustrated with him himself for not seeing it sooner.

"Dean?" Charlie asks, concern turning into something directed for him instead of Cas. Dean shakes it off, and sighs silently. He's here to enjoy himself with his friend, and he can do that without Cas.

"Yeah, sorry," Dean answers, shaking his head.

The next forty minutes are taken up with food and drink, Dean not having any alcohol because he needs to drive home, and because Sam doesn't need him coming home wasted. Lisa tries to flirt with him, but Dean casually directs the conversation elsewhere. Charlie helps a bit with that, and stares at him a bit too hard when he makes his attempts a bit too obvious, but Lisa is getting more and more drunk, so he doesn't think that she notices. Benny and Victor have joined their group when Dean feels his phone buzz in his pocket.

He fishes it out and reads the text messages there. He'd caught the last one of a few, and his stomach sinks as he reads them.

 **My relatives continue to believe that we are dating.**

 **I honestly do not know why Father allows Zachariah to come to these gatherings.**

 **I have been told by Michael that it is highly inappropriate to text while with relatives.**

 **I think I hate my family.**

 **dean plaese com pick m up at park**

The last one is what worries him the most. Cas never slips up his grammar or spelling while texting, and while Dean knows what park he's talking about, Cas is usually much more specific.

 **coming**

He grabs Charlie's arm to get her attention after sending the text. "Charlie, I have to go."

Charlie spins around, and tilts her head at him. "Why? We've hardly even gotten started yet!"

"Cas texted me. I think something's wrong," Dean tells her, stomach churning uncomfortably. Charlie's face immediately turns concerned.

"Oh, okay. Go make sure he's alright, then. I'll text you later."

Dean nods and doesn't waste any time in leaving. He drives faster than he would normally would, probably too fast on the slippery road. It starts snowing, heavy white flakes falling from the sky, and that only makes it harder to see.

Dean pulls up outside the park. He fervently hopes that Cas hasn't been sitting out in the snow, but he fears that he has been.

Dean doesn't bother parking with any care as he gets out and hurries towards the bench where they sit when they come here. The snow starts to pick up, and Dean has to squint to see the hunched over figure sitting on the bench.

"Cas!" He calls out, heart leaping to his throat. As he gets closer, he can see that Cas is shivering, and that there's already a covering of snow over him. "Cas," he says again, softer. He sits down beside him and starts to try and get all the snow off him. Cas sits there silently, not helping or hindering him, simply staring at the ground in front of him.

"Cas, what are you doing out here?" Dean jostles him slightly. "Come on. You can crash at my place tonight." The words might be slightly harsh, but Dean's tone is soft and pleading, and Cas looks up at him slowly and nods.

Dean pulls him up and brushes the snow from his clothes. Dean hesitates but Cas is the one who reaches for his hand, and Dean leads him back to the Impala. Cas gets in the passenger side, and Dean the driver's. He turns over the engine, although he doesn't start driving just yet. He turns on the heat and looks over at Cas.

He's shivering and he's hunched over, staring at nothing. Dean slides over and awkwardly puts an arm around him. Cas doesn't respond, and Dean deliberates for a few seconds before drawing Cas even closer. He cold, and Dean can warm him up.

"Hey," Dean says softly. "What happened?"

Cas shivers and deflates. Dean bites his lip but waits for Cas to speak.

"Zachariah was preaching his homophobic bullshit," Cas starts, voice rough. "They were all just… listening, Dean. No one said anything to stop it."

Dean feels a rise of trepidation and Cas leans back into him. Dean puts his head on top of Cas', wanting to help him as much as he could.

"I just… stood up. I don't know what came over me. I started off fairly reasonably, if I do say so myself."

"But let me guess. It didn't stay reasonable."

Cas shakes his head slowly. "I… started yelling. Among what I was saying, I said that I was taking medicine, no matter what Father has to say about it." Dean sucks in a breath, and Cas laughs. It's not a laugh that Dean wants to hear repeated. It's hopeless and _sad,_ and it makes Dean angry to hear it. His arms tighten involuntarily on Cas.

"I know. Probably one of the worst times to say anything about it." Cas sounds despondent, and Dean can't blame him.

Dean just shakes his head. "Jeez, Cas." He can't even think of anything else to say.

Cas sighs. "My Father told me to leave if I couldn't be conciliatory. I assume he wanted me to just go to my room, but I left the house instead." Cas yanks off his tie and jacket, leaving him in his pants and top. He untucks his top and Dean relaxes slightly at having Cas looking more normal.

"Hey, it's good that you texted me," Dean says. "You know that you always can."

"Yeah," Cas says, and he sounds tired.

There's a pause, and Dean narrows his eyes. He leans back and Cas slowly turns to face him. Dean looks into his eyes, and his worry becomes fear.

"Cas. You're not buying into his crap, are you? I thought you already decided he was full of shit last year, when you came out to your family."

Cas shrugs slightly, diverting his eyes. "I don't know," he mutters. "Even Anna didn't say anything to support me, Dean. They just sat there…"

"Hey. Cas. Look at me." It takes a few seconds, but Cas's eyes come back to rest on him. "Don't listen at them. They're idiots, okay? They don't know anything about you, and if they did, they'd be rushing to your defence. Don't listen to anything that comes out of their mouths. I think you're worth more than all of them combined. They don't matter. Don't let them matter." Dean thinks he sounds slightly desperate, but Cas is just staring at him with his blue eyes, and Dean just wants him to be okay.

Cas leans forward slightly until it seems like they're breathing the same air. "Dean…" He trails off, and Dean swallows.

"You are worth something, Cas. Worth something _to me_. I _promise_."

Cas's eyes are soft and he leans forward a bit more and then _holy fuck_ Cas is kissing him and Dean can't kiss him back fast enough. Cas's hands come up to cradle his face gently while Dean's hands knot in his hair. Cas presses into him and Dean just kisses him back harder. Cas's lips move gently against his own, and Dean takes a second to try to understand the fact that Cas is _here_ that Cas is _kissing him_ for some reason that Dean doesn't get but will take.

He eventually leans back, and they stare at each other. Cas licks his lips and Dean's eyes flick down to admire them, red and spit slick.

"Come crash at my place tonight," Dean offers, voice slightly rough. "Don't go back to them yet."

"…Okay," Cas says quietly. Dean slowly slides his hands out of his hair and Cas's hands fall back to his side. When he hasn't moved for a few seconds, the corner of Cas's mouth tilts up. "You going to drive us back to your apartment?"

"Uh, yeah," Dean stammers, and goes back to the driver's seat. He pulls out onto the street, which doesn't have many cars on it thanks to the snow, which had only gotten heavier.

The drive is completed in silence. Dean wonders if Cas is regretting kissing him, or if he's replaying it over in his head, like Dean is. By the time they reach Dean's apartment building and Cas still hasn't said anything, Dean is starting to get edgy. He parks the Impala as best he can, and gets out, looking up. He hopes it won't snow too much.

Cas is already heading upwards, and Dean follows him up the stairs to his apartment. Before Cas can knock on the door, Dean grabs his elbow. Cas turns to look at him, and they stand there silently before Dean speaks.

"Cas… what…"

Cas swallows. He pulls his arm back, and Dean lets it slide through his hand reluctantly, but then Cas stops, and they're left holding hands.

"Dean," Cas starts. "I know that I am not the least complicated person. I know that you put up with a lot of problems because of me, and I'm grateful for that."

"Cas, that's ridiculous," Dean tells him. "Don't be dumb."

Cas shakes his head. "I am serious, Dean. I am grateful. It's my own selfishness that makes me want more from you. You do not have to –"

Dean shuts him up by pressing their lips together again. Cas tries to continue talking, but Dean just kisses him harder. When they break apart, Dean speaks before Cas can.

"I didn't think you'd ever want someone as broken as me," Dean breathes softly. Cas' eyebrows immediately lower, and he gives Dean a more serious look than normal.

"You are not broken, Dean," Cas tells him gravely. "You are beautiful."

Dean looks aside. He unlocks the door to find Sam on the other side, obviously listening to them.

"Sam!" Dean exclaims, feeling his face heat up.

"What?" Sam asks. "I just wanted to know if you guys had finally worked everything out."

"What?" Cas and Dean say simultaneously.

Sam rolls his eyes. "Charlie and I both think that you two should have started dating years ago. She had mistletoe up all over her house for her party, didn't you notice? She wanted to catch you two under one of them. But I guess you worked stuff out by yourself." Sam turns and heads inside, and Dean exchanges a glance with Cas before he follows his brother.

"Sam, it's late. You should go to bed," Dean says.

"Dad came in an hour ago," Sam says. He frowns for a second. "Passed out in front of the apartment. I had to drag him inside."

Dean supresses a sigh. "I'll talk to him in the morning, Sammy. Just go to sleep."

Sam nods. "Good night, Cas."

"Good night, Sam," Cas replies. Sam looks down at where they're still holding hands, and smiles slightly. Dean can't bring himself to unlock hands with Cas, so he doesn't.

"You need anything?" Dean asks him.

Cas shakes his head. "Can we go to sleep?" He asks. "I'm tired."

Cas does look tired, but it's not like him to admit to something like that. "Sure," Dean says. "There's an extra toothbrush that you can use in the bathroom. You can borrow some of my clothes to sleep in, as well."

Dean leads Cas to the bathroom and avoids the room furthest down the short hallway, not wanting to go near his father. He finds some clothes that will for Cas and are comfortable enough to sleep in, and gives those to him while he's in the bathroom so he can change. After he's done, Cas stands awkwardly in the hall.

"I can just sleep on the couch," he says, and Dean rolls his eyes.

"Don't be ridiculous. You can sleep with me."

Dean closes his door after Cas, and pulls Cas into his bed after turning the lights off. Cas quickly pulls the covers up over them, and they huddle together away from the cold of the winter night. Dean just stares at him for a few seconds. He hadn't thought that this morning, he would be going to sleep with Cas in his bed. By the look on Cas's face, he hadn't been expecting anything like this to happen either.

"Good night, Dean," Cas says softly.

"G'night Cas," Dean mutters. Before he can think about it, he slings an arm over Cas's waist. Cas freezes for a second before he curls up around Dean. Dean breathes out a sigh of happiness and tightens his arm around him.

"Merry Christmas," Cas says quietly, and Dean thinks that it has indeed been a Christmas to remember.


End file.
